I don’t want to parent today!

If you’re having a particularly pump day remember there is always someone having a worse one! Today that person could quite possibly be me!

So today is Sunday, the weekend, time for a lay in after a hectic week of work and early starts! Well that was until I was gently reminded at 0445hrs this morning that I am a parent and that lay in’s don’t count and yes; I know, before you say it, I chose to have children.

In a tired and very much dazed state I spent the first 20 minutes of this morning peeling my youngest out of his poo covered pyjamas, trying my hardest not to become contaminated with the contents of his now exploded nappy.

I somehow managed to carry him, naked and still covered in poo to the shower to hose him down. My moment of failure was not ensuring the shower head was at the optimal angle before hosing him down, which resulted in being struck in the face by the tidal wave of poo and water that had been deflected off of him.  My only saving grace was the fact my mouth was closed.

Having cleaned myself up and loaded the washing machine and switched it on only to see the Sky TV and the DVD player remotes swirling around in the washing machine which is now filling with water, yes, parent error for not checking!

By breakfast my house resembled a warzone and I have folded the washing basket contents at least 20 times following Chester’s destruction. He destroys one room; I go and tidy by which time another room is destroyed. It’s a vicious circle of destruction and I struggle to comprehend how one small person can bring a whole house to its knees in minutes.

I have decided I really don’t want to parent today, but despite not wanting to, I have to, I have no choice, these two need me and they need me to parent.